In Better Hands

 Poorly conceived Hysteria still proves necessity is the mother of invention

By

Morgan P Salvo

Sometimes a filmmaker’s lofty ideas get in the way of execution. Such is the case with Hysteria, a flick that just scratches the surface of the never-ending fun and/or pathos that should be derived from such a touchy subject matter. Director Tanya Wexler tells the story of the invention of the first vibrator with quaintness and cuteness instead of the raging satire it so richly deserves. The opening prologue of “based on a true story” is followed by the smug … “really,” leading us to believe that this might be a flick with wit and vigor, but what we get instead is a romantic comedy period piece with the vibrator saga as backdrop. Personally I feel the Victorian period is boring unless a werewolf gnaws on someone’s neck.

The plot of the first female massage gizmo is that women are diagnosed with hysteria and bad thoughts stemming from lack of love or attention so they are treated by vaginal stimulation to orgasm as treatment. The specialist in charge of this method, Dr. Robert Dalrymple (Jonathan Price), concludes that hysteria stems from an overactive uterus. He employs a young intern, Mortimer Granville (Hugh Dancy), to help with the overload of clientele.  Granville’s success in manually stimulate patients results in him getting a sore wrist, hand and cramped fingers so his wacky inventor friend (Rupert Everett) and he come up with the first electronic massage unit, or as we today know it, vibrator. Needless to say the device scores a bull’s-eye.

We also follow Granville’s medical career at the orgasm clinic and his relationship with two sisters vying for his attention. We know exactly where this movie is going as Mortimer is first smitten by the more conventional daughter and daddy’s little girl Emily Dalrymple (Felicity Jones) then the feisty rebellious Charlotte Dalrymple (Maggie Gyllenhaal) who defies all logic and operates a shelter on the wrong side of town. Let’s see…in true formulaic movie convention will he go for the safe choice or take a chance and cast all lube by the wayside? And what about all that darn vaginal stimulation - what’s to become of the masses of unsatisfied hysterical women? Well, all these questions arise and everything is dropped like a gently aroused hot potato to hone in on the romantic comedy aspect of this trite and extremely unsatisfying flick.

The portrayal of orgasms vary in degree of silliness (and not believable in the least) avoiding any form of eroticism. The Vibrator stimulation scenes are beyond stupid (as though someone would really sing opera in the saddle). An interesting highlight is that the examination room (or “pleasure cage”) doesn’t have gynecological stirrups of a clinic bed, but rather is more like a velvet-curtained puppet stage shrouded in mystery.

 As though coming direct from the Women’s Channel there are jabs at chauvinism while upholding women’s rights but in the end it’s all about the phony fairy tale idea of doing the right thing and falling in love with the right person. The sub-plot of Maggie running a shelter to tug at our hearts strings is just another phony manipulation of Rom-Com ideology. In the hands of a more seasoned filmmaker, Hysteria could have hit all its high notes and really delivered on what is a very intriguing story. Instead we get the glossed-over and dreadfully serious fact that in its day hysterectomy was essentially a woman’s lobotomy.

The flick’s last third involves a super stagey, unbelievable courtroom scene and the ending is sewn up way too happily with a hard-to-tolerate kiss. Sadly Wexler’s vision for Hysteria is just a tepid telling of what could be a hilarious or deeply serious (not to mention erotically charged) story choosing instead to suck the life out any hopes under its own pretentions. This movie is all touchy feely (pun intended) but in all the wrong places. Credits include a history of vibrators from hybrid feather duster to pocket rockets

Hysteria

Starring Hugh Dancy, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jonathan Pryce, Felicity Jones, Rupert Everett, Directed by Tanya Wexler

Rated R

2 stars