The Devil Made Him Do It

Anthony Hopkins Hams it up amidst looming dormancy while Rites of passage be damned... this flick goes nowhere.


It’s not a good sign when an exorcist movie is rated PG-13…you know the lack of blood and cursing will not suffice for any horror aficionado especially in this overworked genre.
And such is the case with The Rite, a demonic Anthony Hopkins vehicle where once again he gets to strut his stuff by glinting his eyes, rattling off cantankerous innuendoes and sinister wise-cracks all the while under heavy demon make-up and CGI veins popping out of his skin. Think Hannibal Lecter even more possessed.
"Based on true events” from a book by Matt Baglio which documents the initiation of Reverend Gary Thomas of Los Altos, Calif. as an exorcist, this flick treads on thin demonic ice all the way. The Rite is ridiculous from start to finish. The tired old conventions that set this kind of movie up rear their ugly heads immediately with a back story of a father (Rutger Hauer)-son (Colin O’Donoghue) funeral home team that tries to be creepy but is only dull. Bad horror movie set up lines abound, like, “We live with dead people in our house, how much worse can it get?” Son Michael goes off to become a priest but has tons of misgivings and is finally sent to Rome to take an exorcism 101 class because a priest (Toby Jones) sees something in the young lad and utters the stereotypical line, “two months in Rome – how bad can that be?” Classmate Alice Braga sees something in the wannabe troubled priest and flirts with him a lot. Then the teacher Father Xavier (Ciarán Hinds) sees something meaningful and sends him off to play hooky with Father Lucas (Hopkins), a bonafide practicing exorcist and then Lucas sees something like himself in the doubting atheist. Everyone sees it but Michael himself…what a shock. So we get the requisite skepticism followed by tons of proof that the devil exists and lives inside of people. The rest of the movie is in exorcist contortion land while mentor and mentee conduct a slew of the devil-casting-out rituals.
Lucas reminds us early that there is no spewing green pea soup and there are no spinning heads. Yet we are treated to a young pregnant woman’s possession with the gratuitous neck cracking, convulsing, drooling and body twisting acrobatics we have been so exposed to in these kinds of flicks. Michael still is struggling with logic versus faith but there’s nothing like coughing up bloody nails (just a hunch but I’m guessing from Jesus’ cross) to convert an atheist non believer, but oh wait that still doesn’t do it. Until Lucas himself becomes possessed does Mike have a day of reckoning, transforming into an almighty God-accepting-avenger-priest. This movie comes full circle and forms a perfect cheese-ball.
O'Donoghue’s weird acting makes Michael’s ambivalence towards religion and then science never believable. Braga just smirks and then looks bewildered when scared. The only fun is watching Hopkins do what we all know he is capable of: hamming it up. Best scene is when he smacks a kid. Mikael Hafstrom (1408, Derailed) has a way of establishing nice images but the vague emoting, plugged in dialogue, flashbacks, jolt scare tactics and dream sequences still made it feel like a slow-paced one act play about nothing. Rite is a boringly pedestrian movie with little shocks echoing such flicks as the bad Omen sequels or the recent Unborn. It’s a shame…all that devil and nowhere original to go. Hollywood is churning out so much junk in this department that it’s safe to say anything with “the” in its title is sure to suck. I really wanted to be nice to this movie but it clearly had no intention of letting me. What gives them the rite?


The Rite
Starring Anthony Hopkins, Colin O'Donoghue, Alice Braga, Ciarán Hinds
Directed by: Mikael Hafstrom
Rated PG-13
 1 ½ stars